Thursday, 30 May 2013

Surrender before You Begin



Ba is for Bismillahirrahmaanirraheem
and B for Buttons that do not function during summer ;)

Today I am going to write about something that has changed in my life. I'm going to share an experience that I had almost six years ago while I was in the First Year of Medical School.

It was the first day of school, and I remember being so excited!
 I gathered my books and stationary all ready to delve into the madness of becoming a medical student.
 However to my surprise, the first lecture we had was being taught in an arabic medium. 
and so were the other following lectures. 
My excitement turned into slight disappointment.

I mean, regardless of any course you are taking, you will definitely face difficulties in understanding them if they were taught in a foreign language.
 Especially if the language was far beyond the formal teachings you learnt in school due to its modification to its locality, the accents, slang and all.
.
So at that point, I remember coming home, understanding only 10 % of the lecture 
and then had to drill my brain studying more and more. It was tough.
 But I got through it with a Beautiful Help from ALLAH.

It was an Aya in Suratul Baqarah that I routinely recite before class. However only at that point that it touched me.

This was the miracle

 قَالُواْ سُبۡحَـٰنَكَ لَا عِلۡمَ لَنَآ إِلَّا مَا عَلَّمۡتَنَآ‌ۖ إِنَّكَ أَنتَ ٱلۡعَلِيمُ ٱلۡحَكِيمُ


They said: Be glorified! We have no knowledge saving that which Thou hast taught us. Lo! Thou, only Thou, art the Knower, the Wise. (32)

I remember reciting it with all my heart at the beginning of  every lecture and I still do.
Everytime I do it, I always feel so small, so tiny, so humble.
It is because that, I know that whatever I am going to learn in that session is going to be bizzarre information
 that sometimes even my brain cannot contain it.
 I feel like everything is too complicated for me. 
So THAT is when I submit and glorify ALLAH. 
It is because, everything that is about to be taught is known to Him.
 as He is The Creator to all the knowledge, may they be simple, or overwhelmingly complicated.

So I surrender.
I surrender even before I listen to the first word from the lecturer.
I surrender even though I know it's the simplest thing ever.
I surrender even before I become too sleepy due to the lengthy discussions.
  
I surrender because I realize that no matter how easy or difficult the knowledge is.
 It is He who Has the Power to Bestow upon me understanding or otherwise.
 In that Class of 30, it is He who Selects
 the person whom He Wants to Grant Understanding upon
of either a certain topic or the whole subject.
 I mean, the lecture could be in English and Professor could be so interesting. But for all you know, you'd be sleepy or imagining lunch at that time. Hence, the statement above.
 Or it could be a complex biochemical reaction not only breaking your brains but also your heart! but you could be so alert that you'll remember them till the they you die.

So, I practise this dua everyday. 
It is very short, but everytime I recite it, my heart says,

"Right now I'm zero and helpless.
 Please grant me understanding of this knowledge by the Greatness of Your Power. 
Because You are The Creator, I ask to understand the whole lecture.
 But it is also within Your Power to Save some information to keep my wanting for more. 
After all they're all Yours
 and I surrender."

So the thing that changed in my life that I mentioned earlier, is the way I view knowledge.
It has made my studies less stressful and enjoyable.
Every lesson is a lesson not only between me and my teacher,
but also a very formal one between me and my Creator.





Muhammad Mashary Zidane uttered his first 'ba' letter a few days ago just before Maghrib.
and a few more times for his Walid after Maghrib,
Today, he refused to do so, maybe we should move on to 'ma' 
hahaha
anyways, Good Job Baby!
 wa 'ala kulli haaalin,
SUBHANALLAH !
GLORY BE TO ALLAH!


an Egyptian Wedding Party.

When will dinner be ready ?

I ate Fish!

The Bride in White
New, Old, Future Groom



as Handsome as Walid
No problem without my Pacifier
Ummi's tudung tastes like Bubble Gum, Yumm!!!

Sister of the Bride
Shall we dance ?


Ummi tried so hard to look nice she forgot my shoes..!

Zidane Aiman Muhammad Ahmad

Father of the Bride

Safe and SOUUUUNNNDDDD...


Monday, 27 May 2013

Ummi's day CELEBRATION!



Bismillah Walhamdulillah!

It was the 12th of May,
when almost everyone were celebrating their mothers!

A few days before, 
My Sister sent me a message asking me to fly a little gift for Mama from Egypt,
Alhamdulillah it made it in KL.
Just not in time for mothers' day.
So I was a lil bit frustrated.

The day before Mother's day,
The three of us were waiting in a long long queue,
in the children's hospital for a follow up session with the Pediatrician.
During the wait,
I took a glimpse at my husband holding my baby in one arm and his notes on the other.
I said to myself,

"Oh this is what I want for Mother's day, 
A Healthy Boy & A Hardworking Husband"


Well then Mother's day came,
on a Sunday,
which was a working day, and a schooling day,
in Egypt, so it felt like another ordinary day.

Till My husbdand came home that evening insisting that we dress for the occasion and celebrate!

Never would I have imagine such a big crowd celebrating my day????!!
Future celebrating-their-wives-on-mother'sday Daddies
Future Brilliant Mommies


While entering the Restaurant, I immediately saw Anis, and I was so delighted that we were gonna have dinner at the same place!

But after taking a few more steps forward, I saw a looooong table filled with familiar faces!!
I was even more excited that we're having dinner with more people!!
but still had no clue why they were there..

till they all sang the birthday song...
oops the Ibu song..
hahahaha...



Wow, I never really imagined that my first mother's day celebration would be this grand!

All thanks to my Dear Husband,
who put all his sweat and blood ($$$)
into this extraordinary party.
of course with some help from very loyal friends.



On that day I prayed so much for all the mothers in the world.
Being a mother has been such a wonderful experience,
I remember my long lost best friend asking me,

Gg : So how has it been, Tasnim? Being a mom and all?
Me : It's just so wonderful that I pray all my friends will get married and have their own children soon!

:)


ALHAMDULILLAH 
For you have created me a son,
and made me a mother.

Please Grant upon me Strength like those You Granted upon
Aminah, Hajar, Khadijah, Fatimah (RAH)
who created Miracles by raising Heroes.

ameen.

Saturday, 11 May 2013

A Mother's Love

Bismillahirrahmaanirraheem

You're like a flower that grows so high,
For your beauty that soothes our hearts,
For the sweetness of the scent you bring,
You're The Mother we'd never trade.

You're like the star high in the sky,
Shining so bright in the gloomy night,
You light our lives from dark to bright,
We'll pray for you to cherish the light.

Coz Mama, 
We love you,
For all of our lives,

Coz Mama,
We love you,
All days and all nights.

Wow, it seems that it was just yesterday that I wrote this poem.
I actually wrote this back when I was in Form 1,
Actually it was a song I composed for my mom that I never sang,
Because I doubted that my voice would do any justice to it..(haha..)
Maybe one day when I find someone to sing it, 
I'll post it here, insyaALLAH.


This post is a gift to my mother,
who has been just the right mother for me.
Everything she does, all that she is,
has made me the person I am today,
She inspires me to work hard,
and her faith in ALLAH is just amazing,
as she always tells me to leave everything to ALLAH 
once I've done my best,
reminding me constantly after every exam,
like really, each and every one of them.

I love you, Mama.
I've got nothing to give you,
but you only deserve the best.
I hope somehow,someday I will be able to make you proud,
though I know my happiness is all it takes to make you smile,
ALLAH Only Knows how much you have done for us,
ALLAH Only can Repay all your sacrifice.
Happy Mama's Day!























Photos above were taken on the day we left our nests.
We were of course in debt to the women who raised us and taught us how to live and love,
Thanks for all the prayers you sent for us every single moment,
Verily we feel them at every beating of our hearts.

Happy Mothers' Day.
ALHAMDULILLAH!